Momaical: [mom-mahy-uh-kuhl] Noun: A Mom trying to raise children, clean, cook healthy food, taxi from here to Harlem and back, and have an intelligent conversation with someone other than a cashier while trying to fit into her jeans and locate her cell phone. Origin: 2012 < Medieval Latin maniacus of, pertaining to madness. Momaical = Hybrid of Mom and Maniacal.

10.15.2012

I'm Gonna Be A Billionaire!

I am so excited.  I'm talking superdy-duperdy-extra-McExcited-with-a-cherry-on-top kind of excited!  I probably shouldn't even be sharing this with you - but I am bursting inside.  I can't keep it a secret any longer.   I also wanted you to know what is going on because you'll probably be hearing from me next in Bora Bora or Fiji.  I HAVE HIT THE MOTHER LODE.

I received notice today that I am the personal recipient of $30.4 million.  I'm not sure how they found me.  I guess they really like my blog.  But it HAS to be legitimate because it's from the "personal resident Attorney in Burkina Faso to Late Hero Muammar Gaddafi from Libya." 

Muammar Gaddafi wants to give ME his money.  I mean, he's dead - you know after that whole warlord Libya thing.  His family was also killed in the war - so it makes TOTAL sense that I am next in line for the inheritance!  

Barrister Walid Shaukat just needs all of my bank account information to "deposit" it.  And then I am an instant millionaire!  Woo hoo!

But wait....there's more!

I ALSO received notice today from Ms. Mariam Justin Yak.   She got my blog information though her Internet search from "your country national chamber of commerce when I was searching for a good and trust worthy person who will be my friend."  She wants to meet because she wants to "get know each other better and trust each other because I believe any good relationship will only last if it is built on truth and real love."

Blah, blah blah - inheritance money.  Bank.  Needs ME and will share some of her ca-ching.  Boo yah!  Millionaire....again....

And that's not all....THIS came into my inbox as well!

I am Mrs. Fatimah Abd-Al-Hamid, a Muslim woman.  I have picked you for an inheritance.  I am aware that this is certainly not a conventional way of approach to establish a relationship of trust and confidence, but you will realize the need for my action.

Whoa.  I mean, just whoa.  Is this the BEST DAY EVER or what?!?  Now I just have to hand over all my personal information to THREE COMPLETE STRANGERS and sit back to wait for all this money.  I wanna be a billionaire, so freakin bad....

As I sit here, basking in the knowledge that in a few short hours I will be stinking rich and window shopping at Chanel, all I have to say is...do people really fall for this?  Are people REALLY THAT STUPID?   I'm guessing that yes, people really are that stupid. Otherwise why would these spammers bother?

Sigh.  It looks like I have to work hard for my money and drive ALL THE WAY to the store for that winning lottery ticket.  That's my plan to making it big time.   See you in Bora Bora!  

12 comments:

  1. Wow...you ARE lucky. I was only offered $2.5 million from Michael Sherman over at PR Bandwidth.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I mean, $2.5 million is OK and all - but after taxes...it's practially only a million. And, who can live on that? Right? Oh that's right EVERY PERSON I KNOW CAN LIVE ON THAT!

      Delete
  2. Damn girl you're lucky! You should book a trip to Vegas IMMEDIATELY, like NOW1

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Skipping Vegas. Going directly to Bora Bora and Fiji. Party will be there.

      Delete
  3. Well, Dang Tracy! I'll meet ya in Fiji!! After you're done with Bora Bora, of course :) I'm so happy and proud that we've been separately selected for all this cash!! Tee hee... I hope you know I adore your blog. Also saw you on Mamapedia today, congrats... :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fiji is going to ROCK with all of us nouveau riche.

      Delete
  4. OMG you are the luckiest person I know!!! I'd love to shake your hand one day, and maybe some of that luck will rub off onto me and I'll be the recipient of such luck! Oh..wait.....what's this in my inbox????
    "Hello my dearest, I am the widow of a wealthy Nigerian banker...." OH JOY OF JOYS!! Just posting on your blog must've given me the luck I need!! Sorry, I'd write more but I'm off to give her my bank account number.
    Toodles!!

    Teri

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Totally understand. Come meet us in Fiji.

      Delete
  5. You certainly seem like a good and truth worthy person. I don't know why you question these things. You're so skeptical!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's true. I need to just throw caution into the wind and send my bank account information and social security number. You've convinced me. I'll give you some money as well now for talking me into it. Just send me your account info...

      Delete
  6. You must have done something right....See ya in the south pacific! Love your blog!! You're too funny!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Nell! We are going to have one hell of a party! See you there!!

      Delete

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